Escort etiquette can seem complicated if you're new to it. By knowing a few basic rules, you can take the guesswork out of your escort meeting.

I once watched a man single-handedly ruin his first ever escort booking.

He seemed like a nice enough bloke – a guy from the country, visiting the city for the Melbourne Cup. When I spoke to him on the phone, he was cheerful and only a little nervous.

But on the night, it was a different story. We were supposed to be meeting in the lobby of his hotel. I ordered myself a drink at the bar…and waited. And waited. And waited. Repeated calls and messages to his mobile phone went unanswered and I became anxious that he’d forgotten about me entirely. Finally, he appeared downstairs, disheveled and unsteady on his feet. By the time we got back to his hotel room, it was clear that he’d had quite a lot to drink.

From there, things only got worse. He sat nervously on the side of the bed and whenever I suggested we get closer, he insisted on having another glass of champagne. By the time an hour had passed, he was too wasted to even hold a conversation, let alone consent to having sex. Despite having three hours of session time left, I called it a night and took a taxi home.

I often wonder what he told his friends after that weekend. I could imagine him saying, ‘All call girls do is talk until you fall asleep drunk…and then they leave with your money!’ But the truth was, I’d been doing my best to give him a good experience. He’d messed it up every step of the way.

Lots of people have no idea what to do or say when meeting an escort for the first time. It’s such an unfamiliar situation. Add a pinch of awkwardness around women…throw in a bit of anxiety….and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.

So, what are the ‘do’s and ‘don’ts’? How can an inexperienced client ensure their first escort encounter runs smoothly?

As it happens, I have a few ideas.

DON’T book until you’re ready

Many clients try to rush into their first escort session. They might find someone they like, book at the last minute, and then no-show because they’re simply too nervous. A little anxiety is fine – but terror to the point that you need to cancel isn’t! and even if you do follow through with it, your head (and your ‘bits’) might not be in the right place. Anxiety needs to be managed before you arrange a session - or you’ll end up having a horrible time.

DO spend time getting comfortable before you arrange a meeting

Think it over. Decide on what you hope to get out of your experience. Read about etiquette beforehand, so your brain can get used to the idea. If it’s an option, speak to your chosen escort on the phone or meet them for social time before committing to a full-service session - these are both things you’ll need to pay for, but it’s time and money well spent if it means you arrive at your big date feeling connected and relaxed.

DON’T rush into the sexy stuff when you meet your escort

A lot of new clients try to jam as much sexytime into their booking as possible. As soon as I walk through the door, they’re all over me; sometimes even before they’ve handed over the payment! It feels pushy and rushed, and it’s not at all erotic. As a professional, it’s my job to set the pace…it’s important to chill and let things progress naturally.

DO let your escort guide you

Escorts are experts – not just in sex, but also in the art of connection. A good session means taking time to get to know each other, flirting, getting closer, and feeling sexy. It’s important to let your escort lead you through this gradual process, especially if you’re new to it. Of course, it’s fine to ask for what you want…but trusting us to set the pace is the best way to have a relaxed, fun experience.

DON’T have more than one drink beforehand

A nip of something strong to steady the nerves is a socially acceptable way to get in the mood for a date, paid or not. But when you’re nervous, it’s easy for one drink to become three or four – and then you’re in trouble! Being under the influence will wreck your judgement, your social skills, and can also affect your ability to get an erection. None of these are good things, especially considering you’ve invested so much in your first escort booking.

DO have a nice bottle of wine ready

Sharing a glass of wine (assuming both you and your escort drink alcohol) is a nice way for us to get to know each other before further intimacy. I recommend asking what your escort likes ahead of time and getting a beverage that they enjoy. Don’t forget to open the bottle in front of your escort, so they know it’s safe!

Seeing an escort is a LOT like a regular date – it can seem nerve-wracking and intimidating, but the struggle is totally worth it.  At the end of the day, it’s just about making friends with another human being. If you slow down, give yourself time to get comfortable, and make an effort to connect, you’ll have a great experience.

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